I got a catalog in the mail a month ago that was peddling Christmas goods. It was 90 degrees that day. It was hard to fathom future Christmas when my skin felt like it was frying when I went outdoors.
But of course the hawking of Christmas wares in early September was inevitable. Over the years retailers have become more desperate to grab the attention (and bucks) of us holiday shoppers, thus pushing their goods earlier and earlier. Back in the old days, these retailers would wait until one holiday was over before barraging us with junk for the next one. Such sweet, simpler times.
Then some zippy retailers started selling Christmas goods a few weeks before Thanksgiving. This was the crack that has led to our current shopping pandemonium: a fall-winter holidays palooza of decorations all available at once. Go to some home goods stores in the fall and you’ll see all types of decorations mashed together. In one day you can buy a life-sized skeleton with flapping arms, a doormat which states, “Turkeys Beware: Deep Fry Zone Ahead,” and a motion-activated dancing Santa Claus singing “Gangnam Style.”
It seems at some point we busy consumers will just give up and join in, blending all our fall-winter holidays decorations too. Instead of laboring to decorate our homes for each celebration, we’ll just mash them all together like some stores.
What a relief this will be! There will be no need to get out boxes of decorations each month only to pack them back up a few weeks later. In our busy world this is way too much effort. Decorating once just makes sense. Then we can devote more time doing the quality things that really matter during the holidays, like spending more time on our phones watching TikTok videos.
And why should we wait until the day after Thanksgiving to set up our Christmas trees? (Which, let’s be honest, is really a pain after just cleaning up the Thanksgiving onslaught including cleaning the walls the little kids smeared with buggers and mash potatoes.) Instead let’s go for Labor Day and use fake trees. Sure they’re soulless imposters, but real trees sacrifice their lives and then die – just too sad.
Decorations can represent each holiday however one interprets this. Blinking carrot lights, yellow rubber ducks and “House of the Dragon” figurines? Sure! If the pandemic has taught us anything, it’s to decorate our homes in a way that makes us think happy thoughts instead of spiraling with worry about things like the demise of the world’s financial markets (and your retirement accounts). So why follow some dated norms based on tradition or so-called good taste? Decorate simply to boost your fragile mental state.
And won’t it be nice to stop having these judge-y norms about when decorations should come down? Finally the people who leave their outside holiday lights up all year round can feel vindicated, not lazy. And the people who don’t take down their Christmas tree until February can stop getting concerned looks from their friends and family like they’re considering an intervention. Really, maybe we should never take any decorations down at all. Why bother?
The fall-winter holidays will be here again in just a mere nine months – barely enough time to get through all the good streaming series on our watch lists. Maybe instead we should just add in some decorations for the other yearly holidays, like the Fourth of July and Saint Patrick’s Day. No doubt catalogs peddling these wares will be arriving soon.
By Mary Lynn Bruny. Mary Lynn writes about local real estate and home-related topics. Contact her at [email protected]. To read previous The Lighter Side articles, go to athomecolorado.com/the-lighter-side.